I have all the time in the world to organize everything that needs organizing, vacuum, dust, mop, read, plant flowers, exercise, etc etc etc…
I get so much satisfaction in doing these things. I feel like, okay, I’ve not wasted the day away. However, since becoming a stay at home mom, I’ve become extremely lazy. Like uncontrollably lazy. And YouTube – yea, it’s my best friend. I won’t answer my phone if I’m in the middle of a good YouTube video or program. And Netflix oh goodness – it was probably the worst thing we could get for our family because everyone is on iPads watching it religiously. We rarely watch it through the tv, just sit around each in our own rooms on iPads, smh.
Hence why I need to get my life. I need a schedule, some sort of pattern to follow. So I am going to strut myself to the local staples and buy a gigantic planner. I need one where I can write on an entire page all the things I want to accomplish for the day.
Don’t get me wrong, we’re not living in a pigsty. My house is neat, picked up and in order. I cook and clean the kitchen every single day (leftovers don’t exist in this family and though we’re not the healthiest family around, we don’t like eating out a lot), and I do at least one thing a day. Wash/fold some clothes, clean the tub, dust. Something has to get done for me to not feel like a complete waste. But I strongly feel there is more I can be doing with my time. Going to the library. Volunteering at the local food pantry. DIY projects, more activities with the kids that enrich their lives. I do volunteer at my kid’s school twice a week…I forget about that.
I’m inspired by women who stay at home with their kid(s) and do arts and craft projects. Like refinishing and painting dressers and stuff. And transforming their entire backyards into lush gardens with stuff growing from kale to pomegranates. Sigh. I still have batches of flowers sitting in my front yard waiting to be planted (but it has been raining for three days).
I guess I’m trying to equate the value of my staying home vs. bringing in a steady paycheck. This has been rather challenging for me. I mean, duh, being able to walk my kids to and from school everyday, making all of their games, even volunteering at the school adds so much more value to them. Recently my eldest (7) actually mentioned that he’s happy I’m home when he’s home. I forgot that I’d get home hours after them, sometimes just in time to basically get them into bed. I just don’t want to feel like I’m wasting all my extra free time (because there’s a lot of it) on monotonous things like YouTube that add absolutely no value to my or my family’s life. The alternate has typically been going shopping and spending money on things I don’t need that look really pretty hanging in my clot because where am I going to actually wear it too?
So once I get this planner (I’m also a procrastinator – I need to plan to get said planner), I will add meaningful things to my schedule to help me get my life.